crushed

My world completely fell apart about two weeks ago. My best friend got cancer. Then, week and a half, on pregnancy and one breast later they found that the cancer had spread. And now I'm the one who's not coping with it what so ever. After I went to see them in the hospital they seemed to fine with everything, and I can't get out the door sometimes cause I can't find a reason to get up in the morning. I can't even remember why I did get out of bed before this happened, but now it all seems pointless. Why should I get up when we're just gonna get cancer and die anyways. I keep waking up at night, bursting into tears everywhere and not seeing the point of finishing my master thesis when this is what awaits me.

In addition I might have let the perfect man walk out of my apartment and leave the country. He might even stay there.